Achievement

This past few days makes me sit down and think back about this glorious word "Achievement".
Everybody's in this world knows the meaning of achievement rite?
Well firstly, what is the meaning of achievement to you?
Does it means the results of what you have done for?
Or does it mean achievement is like a piece of thin paper that shows a certification of your work?
Also, does it mean an achievement is just something to make you as proud as a peacock?
I'm nearly to 20 years old, I asking myself how much did I achieved?
How about you? have you count your own achievement?
My answer is I'm a failure rather than a winner.
Since I'm a kid, I think I am a winner and forever a winner. But things never done with my plans or ideas.
Sometimes it makes me think, am I starting to become one of the junk to the community.
Peoples around me already in the process to make their names to the world by doing a lot of things that can be name as achievement. But here I am in the middle of the community just working for a company which is not stable and can get a pink slip when the times come. Then where is my path?
I'm stuck, my STPM results is one point of failure in my life. Even my own life that I live with, is something that I cant be proud of. I look around and see people who's working after their SPM and people who further their studies. They have a better life, better than me eventhough people will say my life is better than the others. Am I not being thankful for what I have or I want to have something better? At this point I'm clueless, to clueless until theres no word to describes it. People around me and you if they see this kind of post will just say be an optimist, there's still have a chance, you're still young enjoy it, and all those craps that even they cant make it happen is not a booster to me. Rite now I'm an actor without a script or a director without his crew. I'm lose and lost. Two word with one explaination. Living with pain but no gains.Whatever, I'm done writing......